May 2012 – seoul | tapperilla

I just had my 9 month Korean anniversary last Thursday, May 17th. Holy shit! In the 9 months that I could have been with child, I have had 5 visitors, 4 of which hail from the Orient. Damn I’m popular, especially amongst the Eastern folk. The last most amazing friend in the world to trek their ass across the world for me with a bag full of cheese and other American delicacies was my lil WAWA!!! Her 10 day visit definitely warrants a posting.

I was so freakin excited to see Wawa! I haven’t seen her since I think my birthday last year (I think), but of course we have kept up to speed on all the juicy gossip that’s gone on in our lives in between. But, I was especially excited for 10 days of good old fashion girl talk, rehashing past relationships, current whatevers, what went wrong and adding further insight to the past, that we’ve since gained in our old age. Oh, and play tour guide of this country that is now my home away from home. I was a little nervous to play tour guide because the pressure’s on, but it was probably the closest to relaxing yet jam-packed trip possible. Twas awesome.

Wawa and about 10 pounds of candy came to school with me 2 days of the week, so she helped teach and squeeze the cheeks of my 3rd and 4th graders with me and Jin. My classroom is also on the 6th grade floor, and since she didn’t come to class on days I taught them or 5th graders, they could only get candy if they asked Wanda a question. Most of them asked the same shit, “What’s your name?” “How old are you?” “Where are you from?” and just dug their dirty hands into the bag of candy, but then they had to actually ask her good questions. Especially the smart ones. I made them. Some were actually good “Who’s your favorite Hollywood star?” and of course “Do you have a boyfriend? No? Why not?” Our favorite question EVER. Both days that she was here this is what it looked like just outside my classroom. I had to play zookeeper to a bunch of candy crack babies a couple times. That was fun.

Wawa is also no longer “solo.” I knew she’d come to Korea and find a boyfriend ASAP. This is her and her new boyfriend Julian. They even dress like a kouple.

Our absolute most favorite day of her trip was our “Day of Culture.” That day we went shopping in Insadong where we got down to tradition and cried of laughter as we posed in Hanbok. We went to Gyeongbokgung Palace and got a taste of celebrity when some middle schoolers asked to have their picture taken with us, saw the King Sajong statue, ate some bomb tofu and pajeon (Korean seafood “pizza”), drank tea at a lovely little tea house, and went shopping for a fish and live octopus to eat at the Noryangjin fish market. I ate live octopus for my 2nd time. Jesus.

Here’s a video of us eating that octopus.

We also had some very ladylike evenings. We caught a jazz show at my favorite location in Seoul, Jazz Story, in Hyehwa, and had a night of vagina at Vato’s Tacos followed by some vagina pops at a Vagina Monologues show.

We went to Gangnam and did what you do in Gangnam. Take glamour shots and hang out with very sophisticated men.

We also hiked, or rather walked 50 million flights of stairs, up to Namsan Tower to lock up our love (next to mine and sista’s) to forever overlook the smoggy sky of Seoul, and found our first epic Geocache.

All in all, it was soooo much fun having my lil Wa here! I’m so happy she came and it’s always nice to have visitors because it gives me a chance to feel like a tourist once again 🙂 Here are a couple other highlights of her trip.

Our new Vietnamese family.

Eating fried potatoes with some new male suitors.

Eating a hot dog wrapped in a pancake.

Swapping manicure secrets.

Shopping with ajummas, her new favorite breed of people.

Schaeff Schaeff loves you WaWa! Now come back soon! Mwah!

In the entire 28 years I’ve graced this planet I have been with my mom on Mother’s Day, so it’s a bit weird to be in a foreign land on the day you’re supposed to celebrate the greatest woman in your life. In Korea they celebrate Parent’s Day, so I explained to my little after school kids and then again this morning during my bi-weekly morning broadcast, that in America we have separate days for our mother’s and our father’s. I then read them a story called “My Mom” and tried my best to explain that it’s weird to be away from your mom on Mother’s Day. Not sure it translated.

Anywaysssss, Mother’s Day was yesterday in Korea but today in America, so I called Mama Schaeff today. Of course I’m congested, coughing and hacking up all sorts of gross Korean air shit, so she took every opportunity to use that to her advantage and annoy me into coming home early. Again. I was annoyed because I wanted to talk to her but she wouldn’t stop being a mom and telling me that I better get better already and to get my ass home. Of course I get annoyed and snappy and want to hang up every 2 seconds. Drives me insane, but she’s my mom and I know she just misses me. In a way the nagging makes me love her even more, especially as I’m getting older. It still drives me mental, but now I find myself thinking in the back of my mind “she just loves you.” That, and my sister decided to skip out of the country today, so Mama Schaeff is without both daughters (just like she was on her birthday 😦 ). So, in her defense, I understand wanting to pick any fight possible. HA.

Aside from that, I know everyone says their mom is the best mom in the whole wide world. But really, my mom is. Joni is so hip, stylish and with it, up on all the celebrity gossip, has the best taste in clothes and also knows which men are the most attractive. She is also one of the most talented artists I have ever seen, and instilled in me the desire to travel and explore the world from the time I was little Dani Tami. I can talk to her like a friend and know that she will always listen to me and bash whoever I want to bash right along with me. And even when it’s not always sunshine and butterflies, because it’s not, I can still find it in me to try and see where she’s coming from, and in the end know that whatever she is upset about, it’s just because she’s being a mom and trying to put me and the siblings Schaeff before her.

Ever since I was in high school I’ve said I always thought I would be the last of my friends to get married because I always wanted to follow in my mom’s footsteps and do all the things she did before gettin hitched and having kiddos. She traveled, painted, dated and did everything in between to make the most of her life before making her life about the 3 of us, and I love her every second of every day for it. She truly is the BEST.

And let’s not forget where Mama Schaeff got her fabulousness from…none other than her most amazing mother, my Grandma Lucy. Even though I only knew her for maybe 10 or 11 years, she is someone I will never ever forget. I think you can see where we get it.